Daily update
The massiveness today is its Maria’s last day at work – she has retired or is retiring when you read this. I think it best to ask her how she feels about this because I feel it’s probably my fault. I am very happy about it but perhaps I shouldn’t be. Somehow we must party tonight!!!
Thank you all so much for enduring these lurid excerpts from my cancer diaries. According to Sis A the titles could make for a collaborative surrealist poem. I love that idea. Particularly as someone else does the editing. I sense that some of you are worried that your news of all the exciting things you are doing that I can’t do, might piss me off – they don’t at all – please keep them coming. Your random news headlines are like gifts to me.
Since yesterday my appetite has tailed away to zero despite the regular anti sickness treatment. I really don’t like this as it’s hard to do anything with an imminent puke on the platform waiting to pull away but I am getting used to it and hope it will diminish in time. The last cycle was terrible probably cos of the Covid vac so I am hoping for a more mainstream journey this time.
Maria is at work today but the lovely J next door (now on this mailing list) keeps checking on me via what’s app so I feel very comfy.
Maria went through hell trying to juggle her responsibilities on the last day playing for exams etc and being here for me. I was absolutely insistent she went. I relish the care she gives me but I do take advantage – I can get my own water refreshed – I can open the door for the cat I am just idle and needy. I am really happy she’s there to close the circle properly they have speeches prepared and whatnot. She can’t miss that although she would like too.
The district nurse Julie just dropped by to adjust my catheter. It had dropped off last night and was tied on by a brilliant silk tie from 1980 I had attached this morning. It’s loads more comfortable. No more rasping and tugging no more pink wee, Happiness!!!
I have been buying opera DVDs from Ebay – so cheap – I would describe them as the sort of German challenging classics I have always vowed I enjoyed but really I endured. Berg – lulu and Wagner – the ring complete. I have an ancient Mac laptop that has a DVD drive so I can watch them in my bed conveniently placed to capture me as I pass out after 15 minutes.
Sometime ago I bought Samual Becketts film collection -blooming not cheap – same category of pleasure anticipated. They are quite short of course, great cultural capital.
Sickness is waning so time to top it up with a blockbuster chemo tab – dreading it.